The Jungle Cruise ride at Walt Disney World is full of hilarious (and eye-rolling) puns, so of course the movie has some great quotes! Here are the best ones.
Jungle Cruise Quotes
The Jungle Cruise ride at Walt Disney World is well known for the puns that the skippers rattle off as you embark on your journey — so it should come as no surprise that the movie based off of this ride, aptly named Jungle Cruise, is filled with some pretty fantastic eye-rolling quotes.
No names are attached to these quotes in hopes to remain somewhat spoiler free, however, the further down the list you go, the more spoilery the Jungle Cruise quotes could get, so be warned.
“All legends are born in truth.”
“I have come here today to request access to your exclusive archives including an ancient Arrowhead recently recovered from the lost expedition of Dr. Albert Falls.”
“Breaking and entering, grand larceny, and worst of all – forced to take public transport.”
“All we need is a skipper.”
“First of all, let me congratulate you on your choice of skipper. Of all the jungle cruises you could take in the Amazon, this one is undoubtedly the cheapest. BUT also the most thrilling.”
“If you look to the left of the boat, you’ll see some very playful toucans. they’re playing their favorite game of beak-wrestling. The only drawback is only two can play.”
“The rocks you see here in the river are sandstone, but some people just take them for granite. It’s one of my boulder attractions.”
“Before this I used to work in an orange juice factory. But I got canned. Couldn’t concentrate.”
“You know they say the boa constrictor right there is capable of eating up to 500 pounds per sitting. Personally I find that very hard to swallow.”
“Hands in the boat. Know this about the jungle. Everything wants to kill you, and can.”
“This is the highlight of the tour. It’s my favorite part of the jungle. Ladies and Gentleman get ready for the eight Wonder of the World. The backside of water!”
“That means get off my boat. I’m only serious.”
“Let’s not start a fight with a monkey vendor.”
“What do you want my boat for? You have nice boats.”
“I have an idea. Please go away.”
“Oh but I do, and I will.”
“I’m not here for a vacation.”
“Dead’s a lot harder, lady.”
“I suppose it’s only a scam if you fall for it.”
“Warm, liquid fear.”
“I think a little bit more fear just came out.”
“Dinner without a dinner jacket is hardly dinner.”
“The price just went up.”
“Nobody touches my engine but me.”
“Who brings a submarine to the Amazon?”
“If you believe in legends, you should believe in curses too.”
“I had a girlfriend once. She was cross-eyed. It didn’t work out. We could never see eye to eye.”
“I’m also quite sure she was seeing somebody on the side.”
“You are deeply unpleasant.”
“You’re the worst cat I’ve ever had.”
“My interests happily lie elsewhere.”
“We’re headed into headhunter territory. Which is a terrible place to be headed.”
“I can’t turn it off.”
“Trader Sam makes a trade.”
“I wouldn’t trust you as far as I can throw you, which clearly isn’t very far because you are HUGE.”
Enjoyed these Jungle Cruise quotes? Be sure to check out my other quotes collections from your favorite movies and TV shows!
About Disney’s Jungle Cruise
Join fan favorites Dwayne Johnson and Emily Blunt for the adventure of a lifetime on Disney’s “Jungle Cruise,” a rollicking thrill-ride down the Amazon with wisecracking skipper Frank Wolff and intrepid researcher Dr. Lily Houghton. Lily travels from London, England to the Amazon jungle and enlists Frank’s questionable services to guide her downriver on La Quila – his ramshackle-but-charming boat. Lily is determined to uncover an ancient tree with unparalleled healing abilities – possessing the power to change the future of medicine. Thrust on this epic quest together, the unlikely duo encounters innumerable dangers and supernatural forces, all lurking in the deceptive beauty of the lush rainforest. But as the secrets of the lost tree unfold, the stakes reach even higher for Lily and Frank and their fate—and mankind’s—hangs in the balance.
Jaume Collet-Serra directs the film, which stars Dwayne Johnson, Emily Blunt, Edgar Ramírez and Jack Whitehall, with Jesse Plemons, and Paul Giamatti. John Davis, John Fox, Dwayne Johnson, Hiram Garcia, Dany Garcia and Beau Flynn are the producers, with Scott Sheldon and Doug Merrifield serving as executive producers. The story is by John Norville & Josh Goldstein and Glenn Ficarra & John Requa, and the screenplay is by Michael Green and Glenn Ficarra & John Requa.
Disney’s “Jungle Cruise” releases in theaters and on Disney+ with Premier Access on July 30, 2021.
Tessa Smith is a Rotten Tomatoes Tomatometer-approved Film and TV Critic. On Camera personality and TV / Film Critic with 10+ years of experience in video editing, writing, editing, moderating, and hosting.